Hello there Hot Moms. I know that it has been some time since my last post, I have been dealing with some personal issues. Lately I’ve noticed that I have been extremely sad, and having feelings of hopelessness. I struggled with getting out the bed daily and staying on top of my routines around the house and with the kids. I felt completely anti-social and wanted nothing to do with anyone. My mood was just as shifty as the spring weather; rainy days, sunny days, cloudy days and even thunderstorms. I was very negative and nasty toward my husband without cause just about every single day and not even the sight of my little 8 month old daughters perfect smile could bring me joy. I felt deep inside that something was seriously going on with me. My husband noticed it too. Even though I had turned into a monster most days, he was still very patient with me since he knew that this wasn’t the bubbly silly woman whom he’d known and loved. I immediately knew the signs of PPD having had kids and having sisters and friends with children who have dealt with or experienced the same in the past. I just didn’t think I was suffering from that specifically since my Zoey was no longer an infant but pushing 9 months old.
I had to make an appointment with my Gynecologist to talk about what I was experiencing because I just could’t function and usually when something is effecting your ability to function normally, it’s time to seek help. As a mother of 4, I can’t take any days off. There’s no time for moping around or wallowing in self pity and I just didn’t want my family seeing me like that anymore! I have heard stories of rich house wives being on prescription drugs for anxiety and depression. Living in Connecticut I’ve encountered a few women who seemed to be medicated and I quickly learned that this was some type of norm in certain communities. So my doctor asked my symptoms, blah blah blah, long story short, I’m on prescription meds now too. I can honestly say that though there were some side effects of almost numbing feelings and moods, which apparently is normal in the beginning because it takes time to get the dosage right for our individual bodies. But after some time (2 weeks) I noticed that I was starting to feel like myself again. My husband was not completely thrilled with me having to rely on drugs to get through my days but he is the type to turn away an Advil. He HATES pills of any kind and believes almost anything can be cured or resolved through physical activity or exercise. (rolls eyes)
I think that as women, we automatically go straight into denial about what’s happening. Most women are made to think we are indestructible and put ourselves last all the time. We take time for the kids, our husbands, work, the house, hell even the pets come before us most times. When you are naturally a caregiver you feel the need to make sure everyone else is happy and running smoothly and as long as that’s taken care of, you’ve done your job. Why are we programmed like this? It really is vital to care for yourself and pay attention to your body. If you feel like something may be wrong it usually is and you need to see someone about it. I only needed the pills for a couple of months and was able to slowly get back to feeling like ME!
Being out of work was another MAJOR factor to my depression. Whenever I am not working or in school, I start to feel complacent in life. I always feel the need to be doing something. Going back to work has definitely helped with my feelings and thoughts of myself. Getting a job that pays almost double what I was making at my previous employer has also helped my self esteem. Now, I still have my moments or days where I get frustrated with the kids, or my hubby but who doesn’t, right? That comes with being a wife and mother. But I have just learned the importance of getting a sitter when the hub and I need a date night. I also have no problem communicating to him when I just need time to be alone and when I do he has no problem stepping it up around the house. This allows me to rest, take a long bubble bath, catch up on my reading, or go out to the stores to buy things that I don’t need. This time is crucial to keeping mom sane. Never feel ashamed or embarrassed about asking for help ladies.
Postpartum Depression effects about more than half a million women each year. This is something that though can be mild to very serious is also very common. If you’ve given birth within the last year and haven’t been feeling like yourself, talk to your OBGYN about the symptoms you are experiencing and get the help you need for your family’s sake and the sake of your happiness!
Don’t allow these thoughts and feelings to get the best of you. We hear all the time about mothers who snap and harm their children or spouses. We can take control, we owe it to ourselves, no matter what life throws our way, we got this!!